Friday, 5 October 2012

Day 5: The Ask-a-Friend-for-Help Challenge

I hate asking for help.  There is something in me that cannot admit to any vulnerability.  I think it's a combination of my competitiveness and my perfectionism.  I hate to be seen as lacking in anything.  Since I've had children, I've relaxed a little, but I still have trouble asking for anything, especially from friends.  I always feel like my friends have more important things to do than help little old me.  I feel guilty for disrupting their lives and routines with my request, so many times I just resolve to live without the help I need.  

My friend Jenn has scolded me many times about my guilt-complex.  So when I thought of this challenge, I knew she would be the one that I would ask for help.  She's a whiz in the kitchen, whipping up meals that I wouldn't have even thought of, all while caring for her four children.  Did I mention she has four children?  Cue more guilt on my part for adding to her busy schedule!

On the very day I thought of this challenge, before I could back out, I asked Jenn to help me eat my pantry.  My canned-goods shelf was overflowing, and the other shelves were all mixed up.  I had bags and boxes and cans of things that I didn't know what to use it for, so I never did.  I knew Jenn would be the one to help me sort and organise and come up with ideas for using all this stuff.

While four of our collection of six children played very loudly outside, Jenn's oldest was at school, and her adorable baby tossed the fridge magnets on the floor over and over again (whatever keeps him busy, right?), we emptied the pantry.  I can't believe all this stuff fit in that skinny little cupboard.

And I even had another cupboard filled with baking supplies...some of which expired in 2010 and I forgot I even had.

Together we tossed the expired items (there were fewer than I thought), organised the rest, and jotted notes for possible ways to use everything.  I ended up with a page full of suggestions and reminders, like "eat the salmon" and "use rice flour".  I'll keep that sheet handy for a while 'til I've used things up.

After our hard work, we even had time to sit with some blueberry tea before Jenn had to go pick up her oldest.  I'm so glad I asked her for help!

Only about an hour after Jenn left my house, she filled my inbox with some of the recipes we'd talked about. I knew she would be the perfect person to help me eat my pantry.  Thank you Jenn!  I'm very lucky to have you for a friend.

Do you ask your friends for help?  Why or why not?  Do you have a guilt-complex like me?  You should try it!  You never know, you just might bless your friends as much as they bless you.


  1. This is an excellent reminder to offer your own and utilize others talents! Thanks for that today :)

  2. I'm like you - I have troubles asking for help. Even when Nicole was a newborn baby and I was overwhelmed and everyone said "ask someone for help!" The person I should probably ask for help more often is my husband! :)

  3. I have trouble asking for help, too. Mostly, it's because I only have one child, and asking for help with one seems silly. (I don't know how mothers with multiple kids do it!) I'm like Bonnie--if I'm going to ask anyone to pitch in, it's going to be my husband. I figure since he sired the boy, he can help out now and again. ;)When I call up a girlfriend, it's normally for a play date or a "When do you think you can get out without the kids?" kind of call. Sometimes coffee without watching kids is just what the doctor ordered!

  4. I ask for help when I need a truck, and while I don't feel guilty, I don't enjoy asking. I can't fill my car trunk with mulch!

  5. I'm like you - perfectionist and want to appear like I can do everything. But every once in a while, I ask my BFF for some help - I hate to do it, but it usually builds a bond that we wouldnt' have had before. Now that I'm in a new town, I really don't have anyone I feel I could ask for help. Thank goodness my husband pitches in when asked. God bless him, poor guy.


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